"Not Every Old Fogie Smokes a Stogie"
Winsforst Place
Gashbag quotient contest
"Not Every Fart Floats"
"Barf on the Cloast"

by Slocketee "Bucky" MerMarchender

Contains mouse juice, inorganic people curd, rickety spittle, harvard mustard,
sprouts, and candied beef. White meat only. Ninety-seven percent fat.


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scraps from June 5
the great way Clinton has fucked around with What It Means to be President

books with archaic words in titles, i.e. Bacon "Great Instauration"?

let us say there are many aspects of the Jesus character which are attractive as ethical idealities

invented a brilliant bong: base shaped like a policeman, smoke inhaled passes through a police-siren whizzer

Evory Cardinol is shooting pool with a broom

"Bums deter, bums determine, bums deter, bums determine ... all these languages," thought Tayo RoDeo Slocheti

the sound of the oldtimer's police car siren was based on the whistling of a popular type of glass pipe

Tuesday, June 6, 2000
El Dagmarmundo Looserino
(note two o's between L and s e r)

Earlier birds seemed quite satisfied by the new scheme, singing in unison, "Don't eat electric guitar. Don't eat electric guitar. Don't eat electric guitar. Big cheese electric guitar." Soon a few soloists came out with, "Hankie and toast, that's how it's roast." Retrochangeroo'd that, originally "customers" for "birds" and the thing the thing with birds is that the sounds they make are so dried out & cleaned up like computer noises to us in their foreignness. Wallace Stevens right biomusicologists wrong-- they seem to me a type of person who might teach at a community college. Musical conceptual artists? Very bad.

Here's what would be Acceptable (the word of the one true light and dog, Bogon): "Say, if there were just one conceptual artist in each field, ever, would be acceptable, and it's probably such, in such and such you know the serious attention." O Bogon Bogon bow before thee.

the danger of a 'religion' based on aesthetic is that it can make the majority of books music paintings etc. seem very very bad, so I will keep creedlessness

holy holy holy holy
expectorate expectorate
holy holy holy holy
expectorate expectorate

that the et expecto resurectionum morturorum or whatever

I seriously recommend that you do not ever learn the meanings of the words of the choral section of Beethoven's 9th symphony.

there are more ways to position two headphone speakers around one's head-- . derive from this many neuroscientific studies which have probably already been done.

I bet, she said, that if mister Dylan had not done so much drugs that he would've become a very competent lead guitarist as well.

when you hear about how Corigliano and the soprano (well-known enough to have a recognizable but unmemorable name, something like Leontyne Price) singing his recasting of some Bob Dylan songs had never heard the originals-- how out of touch our best serious artists are. Imagine whether the originals or the recastings, one hundred years from now, are considered superior.

My grandpa really should be let go by the mill. Sad sad sad, but true enough 'objectively' -- if you disagree with this are you right?

upright tv (surely our most popular vowelless word) correspondent sez: "and the Bed Temperature today is seventy three degrees"

okay there person on down the line reading this now, what sort of picture hav ya got formed of me, what conception's in yer mind? I saw not twenty minutes ago a firebreathing porcine chef in the green noise of the carpet. this is all loose, all without a verifying dictionary folks.

remember that cat-from-outer-space old disney movie? uh-huh. cat is pawing his bed which he finally uses again, never did all winter, maybe feels secure in that completely foreign landscape, (black and white to him, eh? those stacks of tires bagged in yellow plastic, the ropebound scratching post, these are not 'natural' things, but how he uses their representations-- run out of words here

authors pettifogging. they write jerk off music while they can, just flirting around, but once in a while comes something they actually do care about and they try hard and get it right and that winds up a masterwork. most authors don't achieve this, very very few achieve it consistently. I can't think of any movie I've seen that carries through on implicit promises (which are publicly denied). To much money interested. -- if you disagree with this are you right?

you can't do any real good intellectualizing violence, as Fight Club wished to seem to accomplish. falls apart completely, only worthwhile bit to me is "Has cleverness worked well for you?" thing. but they go down a level really, to meatmindedness and bombast, and it falls apart. the level above cleverness could use no violence well

I don't know what 'pettifogging' means.

If you can remember Mister Frump in his Iron Lung, you know me. why, asks Nietzsche, if you can remember Mister Frump, and what he says, can you not pierce closer to the center of my electrical garbage can than any others? This has nothing to do with Herr Professor Nietzsche's life or thought and should not be construed as a commentary or encapsulation of any kind.

Monday, May 22, 2000
in closing i give the archives

And it seemed, while we waited, he began to
   walk towards us      he vanished

he left behind coins, for his lodging,
   and traces of red mud.

--Geoffrey Hill, "Mercian Hymns"

Wednesday, May 17, 2000
Here's kind words from paper now that I'm on my permissionaire kind friend why dinchu telme there's a knife in the door?

The gag reflex was invoked but not enacted, watch the suds turn brown, mayonnaise wiped of the knife to the rim gives the soft promontory, that is between objects of consciousness-- looking at my cat loitering in the kitchen corner vs. looking at the sandwich I'm making, slicing the swiss cheese delib & carefully-- these are very different consciousnesses involved but to us it's "seamless"-- ref Edelman 2000? page what?

Oh, tell me where the answer lies.
Is it in the notebook behind your eyes?

Monday, May 15, 2000
Home of yr own hood's axon yokel dept reportage: see the cup or candleholder tricorne man? Yesterday I was at me own former ganpa's house weeding out diamonds bevor the estate sale and saw a nearly identical formature. I weeded myself a 1939 World Atlas & Gazetteer, an 1876 Maastricht rifle (anyone has a clue about this pls givit to me), welding goggles, a city mechanic's fullbodysuit & an ole green cap.

Thursday, May 11, 2000
For Six long years, Ida baked a cake: it come out real fine & juicy-like, a few steaks & carrots bakin wid the catclaws lickin they hinies. Yeeeah. If penshaunjeuchy had a dollah ever time the mite main raise his voic, it gonna be peas & dollars for de chichesneys. & Kitty WInkle got to be a tarmac bum, shootlin off to ole Fantuckie, when they plays the Fantuckie Variations (ole Ruushin dame) the Umami ppppppffffttt.

End. Begin Fantuckie Fariations, from Farrar Strauss In Giroo, bertleskates of short San Banner. Okay. In 1832 there wasn a fine Fantuckie who like a tear down shorts is all ript up. In 1932 there was no fine Fantuckies what leaked a tear down short cheeks all ript up. In 1839 there was no famed Fantuckie what looked a tear up from shopping cheating & generally ripping the sh-t where - is quivvelent to I.

Wednesday, May 10, 2000
Brain all the way somebody was named,
Praying on the way somebody was made,
This can be a very long song.

Friday, May 5, 2000
Oh gnorp.

Emperor's New Clothes, The (1993)
Regis Philbin .... Emperor

Friday, May 5, 2000
I'm burgeoning at the wrists, folks

Sod on... sod off... sod on... sod off...

Seen another planet on the surface of a piece of toast.

So family talk a mary say the make hyper tandy original stay for theiry wifes and childerens with minnie groves and bags of grapes have a leach time at the savings center

With the cat's taut back and the tail up pointed
Kitty doesn't know the federal judges he anointed
with melted cheese and wild rice and puréed ground chuck
a nine eye spider and a thirty point buck

whoever invented the tabasco shot--
this is a miracle of modern cookery
opens up new horizons in the wares
horseradish shot? palmolive shot? windex shot?

note to sleph: change zippie to six; note check changing suckle -> monday
note smitson histories dispute inuit story naperino
twelve minutes beans; twelve minutes beans
here is my milkcheck baby:
I avent got a disme
it beat me mary thisbe
a parkennachen coat
as a top for miss bedisbe

thanky you, good job friend or fiend, what's your wish?
don't call again, collagen man!--trying to carmelize me.--go away!
statutory cynicism, a real beaut'!--but she's just a dream.
Does this support-em dashes?
Buy this albloom, now. Made from the best stuff on earth. Not a passing enthusiasm.
What a pity... dealpilot.com bought out by the big-as-a-skeeter-full-o'-blood Bertelsmann.
Compare & contrast Nietzsche's and Dickinson's uses of the DASH. The best punctuation mark & I just sneezed thrice, loud enough for the whole building to hear. God plus sneezing! God plus pre-scribing your entry!

& fer yuur listening pleazure: a very small bit of Mr Archie Randolph Ammons:

   Small Song

   The reeds give
   way to the

   wind and give
   the wind away

that's all!--now go take on the day!

Thursday, May 4, 2000
A strange taste-- put a small slice of brie on nearly-boiling soup, very good and very strange, especially if it bonds with noodles. Yesterday I tried to inform you that (warning: spoilers!!!)Zippy and some Suckle can be fast-forwarded with simple techniques, but for some reason bleg bogague a smark bissure.

Wednesday, May 3, 2000
Jorn and Jason are linking to articles about "mitochondrial Eve". Stewart & Cohen raise valid objections to this concept, which I'll try to outline later.

Monday, May 1, 2000
A Dagmar Chili figurine which was sold on Ebay. Don't forget to click the magnifying glass.

Sunday, April 30, 2000
Neale has been doing very good work recently, with features on breasts, vaginas, penises, and a fine drug-running anticdote.

Thursday, April 27, 2000
The spelling of the word 'people' has got me disturbed. I cannot look no more at that God-damned word.

Wednesday, April 26, 2000
Helo i am Dagmar CHili I live at three hundred and ninety eight salazar Street, boston Illinois.

Tuesday, April 25, 2000
And the bygoddest thing happened today, happened: the daily Suckle contained a specific and apposite reference to Monsieur Pynchon's magnum three, Gravity's Rainbow. Clap clap, very good work Mr Suckle Writer!

08:34 a.m.
Time (fifth S Q U A R S H) Saigon , sonny :, is gettin full.

Blosing Number
What we've got here is a pile of dust. Sniff it, it's the genuine article. Smells like rubber, smells like lead. But now, see, as we pull the handpipe, the monkey twitches like a junky squirrel. Now smell it again, please. Smell like glue this time, don't it? If you cash in on a sufficient number of repetitions, you run the risk of smelling like peanuts and wet cement all the time.

Kolossal shite rehatch, it's gonna be !horloyn! oudge in 9_oo tvosday th|*zzzz year!| Lake !choibalsan! hemianalogic 25;;3 the original sequentiæ 23::5 Dutch spoils go to nuts & berries/// we (Salizbar Manikins) join bitch doktor Reecho Claptrap kishday night at The Jakes bar 'n' lounge with tiny white soap flakes and fertile topsoil, I EREF="adhd://rhymes with naya". h2 center br

age 99, {Pon3, pon4]--= (Pon#
Pon@} Poona( peach-corn) Lui$a & Lui$,
Poni Pontrap Poné
Lui$h, &mpersaid
\\ Hex=Ninety Nine Ay Effay Affrontery
Hairy Yitbos, Yenry!

Jibbit jibbit jibbit roux. Alkynomics never so. Let's ten woke a going Alkyhonias about old Alcoholalialogy with driesch. Microsoft Papist Family Member ~alabaster menagerie equals alabama monastery if I see it in print, and can approximate a bastard mahogany


mail chili (excise corrugated boeuf tubule)
make chili

Junkie Squirrels go nuts over Harlem Cherries